I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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