Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
