I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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