i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
How does one acquire holy water?
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
