Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
