ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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