The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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