I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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