Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
