She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
