Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
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I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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