how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize