I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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