Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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