do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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