The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
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She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
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and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
My vagina is officially offended.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420