This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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