butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
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