need another drink. this is the easiest way
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
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I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
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Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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