There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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