I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
