her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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