Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
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