Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
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Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
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I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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