The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
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