he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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