My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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