remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
