i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize