My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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