it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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