so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.