Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance http://tfl.nu/nm0w
  Replies (5) Good night (1310) Bad night (415) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot. http://tfl.nu/tunm
  Replies (45) Good night (1375) Bad night (4906) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this. http://tfl.nu/dz42
  Replies (30) Good night (4856) Bad night (1175) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking. http://tfl.nu/3qfc
  Replies (22) Good night (7186) Bad night (1143) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  ... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): ... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen? http://tfl.nu/sppe
  Replies (17) Good night (3371) Bad night (1394) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville. http://tfl.nu/qtz6
  Replies (7) Good night (944) Bad night (1743)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much http://tfl.nu/5fop
  Replies (2) Good night (1161) Bad night (445) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober. http://tfl.nu/gztw
  Replies (5) Good night (1358) Bad night (726) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in. http://tfl.nu/gea0
  Replies (4) Good night (613) Bad night (1378) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.." http://tfl.nu/em6p
  Replies (5) Good night (4436) Bad night (505) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (337): By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day. http://tfl.nu/1a9r
  Replies (7) Good night (894) Bad night (736) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip http://tfl.nu/igio
  Replies (3) Good night (722) Bad night (215) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever. http://tfl.nu/gebx
  Replies (0) Good night (655) Bad night (455) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (204): View more from Manitoba

  HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (204): HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY http://tfl.nu/xzgm
  Replies (6) Good night (737) Bad night (178) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point... http://tfl.nu/xse9
  Replies (8) Good night (167) Bad night (582) Order T-Shirt

Randomize