Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
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