Your tits are I can't wait for
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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