South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
