i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
