I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
