Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
