she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish