Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
