he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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