shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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