We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
