So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
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