You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize