Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
