Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
