Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Randomize