This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
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