I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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